Category: Little Johnny: Page 4
Little Johnny jokes ready to make you laugh. Huge little jonny jokes archive!
little johnny jokes, funny kids, johnny jokes
The pretty teacher was concerned with one of her eleven-year-old students. Taking him aside after class one day, she asked, "Little Johnny, why has your school work been so poor lately?"
"I'm in love," the boy replied.
Holding back an urge to smile, she asked, "With whom?"
"With YOU!" he said.
"But Johnny," she said gently, "don't you see how silly that is? It's true that I would like a husband of my own someday. But I don't want a child."
"Oh, don't worry," the boy said reassuringly, "I'll use a rubber!"
8-year-old Johnny is walking by his divorced mothers bedroom one night when he hears strange sounds coming from inside.
He peeks in the door to see his mother lying on the bed, rubbing herself and moaning "I need a man. I need a man".
The next night, as he walks by, he again hears strange sounds. He peeks inside to see his mother with a man in bed with her.
The night after that, Johnny's mother hears strange sounds coming from his room. She tip-toes to the door, peeks inside and there's Johnny, lying on his bed, rubbing himself and moaning, "I need a bike. I need a bike."
one day little johnny's teacher says johnny im going to take a shower you stay right here so little johnny says but i wanna take a shower with you and his teacher replys no i dont think that's such a good idea so he says i'll tell my daddy and she says well alright then he gets in the shower and says i want to turn the lights off and his teacher says no i dont think so so johnny says i'll tell my daddy so she says well ok so he turns the light off then he says i want to stick my finger in your belly button and she says no i dont think so. so he says i'll tell my daddy so she says well ok. then she says johnny thats not my belly button and johnny says yeah thats not my finger either.
One day 14 year old little johnny went to a soda shop. The bar keeeper said "I'll give you free drinks for the rest of the day if you can make that horse over there laugh." Little Johnny said "OK" so he grabbed the horse took it to the corner and whispered something, And the horse started dying laughing. so little Johnny got free soda. The Bar keep then said "I'll give you free drinks forever if you can make him stop laughing" Little Johnny shrugged and said "fine" So he walked over to the corner whispered something and messed with his pants and the horse cryed like a baby with no tits. The bar keep said out of curiosity "how did you make that horse laugh?" Little johnny said "I told him I had a bigger dick than he did." Then the bar keeper asked " why did he start to cry" Little Johnny after that dropped his pants and underwear and said "I proved it!"
little jonny has a betting promblem so jonnys dad called and told his teacher. so the next day in class jonny said to his teacher i bet u five dollars you have a mole on your butt. the teacher pulled her pants down and there was no mole.Later that evening jonnys teacher called jonnys dad and told him i think i fixed your sons betting problem Jonnys dad Holloring: No you didnt he bet me he would see your ass before the day was over this morning
At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults hide at least one dark secret and this makes it very easy to blackmail them merely by saying, "I know the whole truth."
So Little Johnny decides to try it out. When he arrives home from school that day, he says to his mother, "I know the whole truth." His mother looks shocked, quickly finds $20, and gives it to him, saying, "Just don't tell your father."
Quite pleased, Little Johnny waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." His father looks shocked, quickly finds $40, and gives it to him, saying, "Just don't tell your mother."
The next morning, Little Johnny is on his way to school when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy decides to try again. "I know the whole truth."
The mailman drops his mailbag, throws opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your real daddy a nice big hug!"
A teacher asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.
Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, "That was good, Mary, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'"
Sally raised her hand and said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated."
The teacher said, "Good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'"
Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was notorious for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate," so she called on him.
Johnny said loudly, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons."
The teacher said, "That was good, Johnny. However, you did not use the word 'fascinate' in your sentence."
Little Johnny continued, "But her tits are so big, she can only fasten eight."
The teacher came in and said kids lets play a type of game. She said i'm going to say a letter and you say the first word that comes to mind. Well she said A. Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher chose someone else because little johnny was known for a bad mouth and she figured he would say ass or something like that. The teacher said B. Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher chose someone else because little johnny was known for a bad mouth and she figured he would say bitch or something like that. She got all the way down to are and no one raised their hand but little johnny. She said little johnny go ahead a say what your going to say. He said rats. Big fuckin rats with dicks this --------- long!
