Category: Kids Jokes: Page 7
Kids jokes have a shortness and simpleness about them that allow an individual at virtually any age to get a good laugh.
Kids jokes, animal jokes for kids, knock knock jokes, scary jokes, and more..
Jimmy came home from school with an F on his geography test. His mother was reviewing his work, and noticed that he had gotten one particularly easy question wrong.
"Jimmy," she asked, "Santa Cruz is in California."
"No, it isn't. It doesn't exist."
"Of course it exists. What makes you think it's imaginary?"
"That's what you told me, mommy," the boy replied.
"When did I tell you that?"
"Last Christmas, when I wanted to know why I didn't get a horse."
"No, I told you that Santa CLAUS doesn't exist, not Santa CRUZ."
A first grade teacher had a small number of children gathered around a table for a reading group. After the story was read she gave the children a work sheet to do. She thought they may have some problems so wanted them to work on it there.
She heard a little girl say very softly "damn!".
The teacher leaned over and said quietly, "We don't say that in school."
The little girl looked at the teacher, her eyes got very big and she said, "Not even when things are all fucked up?!"
A teacher in a rather backward, rural area attempted to broaden the outlook of her class. She asked the students to write an essay on his views of foreigners. All turned in more or less acceptable pieces except for little Billy, whose essay, in full, was "All foreigners are bastards."
The shocked teacher made no direct comment but devoted her next lecture to a description of Greek architecture, Roman law, English drama, German music, Italian poetry, Russian novels, Chinese philosophy and African sculpture.
She then asked the class to write another essay on foreigners.
When she finally got little Billy's paper it said, in full, "All foreigners are bastards. Some are clever bastards."
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
A seven-year-old boy and his four-year-old brother were upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" said the seven year old. "I think it's about time we start swearing."
The four year old nodded his head in approval.
"When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say hell, and you say ass, okay?" The four year old agreed with enthusiasm.
The mother walked into the kitchen and asked the seven year old what he wanted for breakfast. "Aw hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."
WHACK! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the floor, got up and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. The mother looked at the four year old and asked with a stern voice, "And what do you want for breakfast, young man?"
"I don't know," he blubbered, "but you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios."
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith, the Sunday School teacher, smiling sweetly said, "Bobby, when I was a child I was told if that I made ugly an face, it would freeze and I would stay like that."
Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."